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How to Raise Your Game: High Performance Secrets from the Best of the Best by Alan Stein
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Nov 6, 2023
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0:00
My goal today over the next 30 minutes is very basic
0:07
That is to add as much value to your lives and to your businesses as I possibly can in
0:12
our short time together. And if you are watching this right now, I consider you a high-performing leader
0:19
And having spent my entire life around some really high-performing leaders, many of which
0:24
in the game of basketball, I know one thing for certain. High performers like you are looking to grow
0:32
You're looking to develop. You're looking to improve. You're looking to evolve. You're looking for that edge
0:38
And that's ultimately why I'm here this morning, is to help give you that edge by sharing certainly
0:43
a couple of cool stories and a couple of cool stats, but more importantly, some practical
0:49
actionable strategies and thoughts that you can implement immediately with your teams
0:54
to improve your influence and your impact and to help you build unbeatable teams
0:59
and create championship caliber culture. And I know that's a lot to accomplish in 30 minutes
1:05
So we got to make sure that we get this off, we get this started right. And what I need you all to do is to be open-minded
1:12
to adopting the foundational mantra of transformational leadership, which is choosing to look at the world around you
1:22
through the lens of, it's not about me. It's about you. It's not about me. It's about you
1:31
You should be able to look every single member of your family, your spouses, and your children, and significant others. You should be able to look them in the eye
1:38
and say, this is not about me. This is about you. You should be able to look every single
1:43
member of your team in the eye, your colleagues, and your co-workers, and say, this is not about me
1:48
This is about you. And you absolutely need to be able to look every single person that you serve in the eye
1:55
your customers, your clients, your patients, your members, and say, this is not about me
2:00
This is about you. See, when you can shift your focus off of what you want from people and start putting
2:07
it into what you want for people, it's an absolute game changer
2:12
And another thing that I know for certain, if you're always focused on taking, you'll never have enough
2:20
But if you switch your focus to serving and to giving, you'll never run out
2:25
And another important note as far as transformational leadership is making sure that you are crystal clear on your core values
2:35
What do you believe in? What do you stand for? What are your non-negotiable principles
2:42
See, when you can get crystal clear on your core values, it actually makes decision making
2:47
more fluid. It makes decision making easier. Now, this doesn't mean you won't still have really, really challenging decisions to make
2:54
as a leader. It simply means now you have a framework and a construct to make that process more fluid
3:00
Because every single decision you make as a leader, both large and small, you can run
3:06
through the filter of, is this in alignment with my core values
3:10
And obviously, if it is, then you proceed. If it's not, then I would hope at the very least you have a slight hesitation
3:17
And by doing so, then you become the type of leader that you'd want to follow
3:23
You become the type of teammate that you'd want to play with
3:28
And don't ever forget, you cannot lead your team somewhere that you're not going
3:33
and your team cannot become something that you're not. So we have to get crystal clear on our core values
3:39
When it comes to transformational leadership, I don't know that anyone does it any better than my longtime friend and mentor, Jay Billis of ESPN
3:50
For those that don't follow college basketball as closely as I do, even though we're in the throes of March Madness right now, just know that Jay is the face of ESPN College Game Day
4:01
And back in December of 2010, there was a really highly anticipated game that pitted Duke versus Butler
4:08
And the reason this game was so highly anticipated were those were the two teams that met nine months previously in the national championship game where Duke narrowly escaped with a two point win
4:19
And it's very rare in the game of college basketball that the two teams that meet on the biggest stage end up meeting in early December at a non-conference game
4:29
So as I said, there was a tremendous amount of hype and buzz and anticipation around this game
4:33
Well, part of Jay's responsibility with ESPN is he watches both teams practice the day before the game
4:41
He wants to watch them practice so he can get an idea where their strengths lie
4:45
He can find out their strategies and their keys to victory. He can learn everything he can about their personnel
4:52
Well, Jay, being a Duke alum, decided that he would go watch Duke practice first
4:57
And Duke was at the time, and still is for at least another week, led by Hall of Fame
5:03
coach, Coach K, the all-time winningest coach in the history of college basketball
5:09
And when Jay walked into the Duke practice, he saw Coach K saying with great conviction
5:13
and clarity and confidence, guys, if you do what we do well and you stick to our game
5:20
plan, we'll be more than fine tomorrow because we clearly have the competitive advantage
5:26
We are bigger, stronger, and more powerful than Butler is. If you do what we do well and you stick to our game plan
5:33
we'll be more than fine tomorrow because we clearly have the competitive advantage
5:37
We are bigger, stronger, and more powerful. We will pound the ball down low
5:40
and get easy layups and dunks. We'll out-rebound them and we'll contest every shot
5:45
I'm telling you, if you do what we do well and you stick to our strengths, we'll be more than fine tomorrow
5:50
because we clearly have the competitive advantage. And Jay left that practice was thinking, this could be a massacre tomorrow. Coach K, one of the best to ever blow a whistle or hold a clipboard, just told his team definitively why they have the competitive advantage
6:09
But he needed to do his due diligence. So he went to watch Butler practice. And at the time
6:15
Butler was led by coach Brad Stevens, who last year was promoted from head coach to president
6:19
of basketball operations and GM of the Boston Celtics and the NBA. And to Jay's surprise
6:25
when he walked into the Butler practice, coach Stevens was saying with the exact same level
6:30
of confidence, clarity, and conviction, guys, if you do what we do well, and you stick to our game
6:36
plan, we'll be more than fine tomorrow because we clearly have the competitive advantage. We are
6:43
smaller, quicker, and faster than they are. If you do what we do well and you stick to our game plan
6:48
we'll be more than fine. I'm telling you, we have the competitive advantage. We are smaller, quicker
6:53
and faster. We'll get tons of fast break points. We'll put on a smothering full court press
7:00
and there's no way their big guys can get out to our corner shooters. If you do what we do well
7:05
and you stick to our game plan, we'll be more than fine because we clearly have the competitive
7:10
advantage. And Jay left that practice and started thinking, I got no idea who's going to win this
7:17
game. Both of these Hall of Fame caliber coaches have the self-awareness to know what it is that
7:23
they do well and what gives them the best chance to be successful. And I share that story with you
7:29
for a couple of reasons. One, you as a leader need to be introspective
7:34
and aware enough to know where your strengths lie. What are your natural talents
7:41
What are your gifts? What are the strengths that you have that can add the most value to those that you serve
7:47
But I also want you to look through the lens of team awareness and ask yourself organizationally
7:52
what is it that we do really, really well that gives us a competitive advantage
7:57
And I'm hoping after our time together this morning, that I will convince you to make the three pillars of self or three areas of self that we need to improve part of your secret sauce part of what makes you such an impactful and influential leader And that what I like to unpack now Our three pillars that I
8:17
want you to consistently raise your awareness of. And those are your habits, your mindset
8:24
and your focus. So let's unpack each of those. First, let's take a look at your habits
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the things you do consistently and the things that you do unconsciously
8:37
A Duke University study found that 42% of everything that we do during our waking hours
8:43
is habitual. That means almost half of everything we do from the moment we wake up to the moment we
8:52
go to bed is on autopilot. We have grooved a series of repeatable patterns, repeatable behaviors
8:58
that are now giving us comfort. So I have a really important rhetorical question
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to ask each and every one of you. If you're logged in right now and you are watching this video
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like I said, I already consider you a high performer. But my question for you is
9:13
are you a high performer because of your habits? Or are you a high performer in spite of your habits
9:23
If you were to list all of the things that you do routinely every single day, that 42%, if you were to write those down, what percentage of those habits are helping you
9:32
And what percentage of those habits are hindering you? What percentage of those habits are taking
9:38
you closer to the person that you strive to become? And what percentage are dragging you down and
9:43
weighing you down like an anchor? Here's an actionable takeaway. I want you guys to write
9:49
these instructions down and I want you to sit with this and reflect with this over the rest of this
9:53
week and this coming weekend. This self-audit is an absolute game changer if you do it with some
9:59
honesty and some vulnerability. I want you to take a piece of paper and I want you to draw a vertical
10:03
line down the middle. On the left side of the paper, I want you to list, and this can be an
10:09
exhaustive list, of the things, the activities that fill your bucket. The things that give you energy
10:18
that light you up, that make you smile, that give you confidence. These could be things for your
10:23
physical well-being, like taking a Peloton class or doing some yoga poses or going for a jog
10:30
These could be things for your mental well-being, like reading a book or listening to a podcast or
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watching a documentary. These could be things for your emotional or spiritual well-being
10:40
like meditation, prayer, or deep conversation with a loved one. But I want you to write down
10:46
an exhaustive list of the things that recharge you and fill your bucket. Then on the other side
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of the paper, on the right side, I want you to write down how you've been spending the bookends
10:58
of your day. How have you been spending the first 60 minutes after you wake up and the last 60
11:04
minutes before you go to bed, your morning and your evening routine? How have you been spending
11:08
them over the last several months? And I'm well aware that every single day is not identical
11:13
that your Sunday and your Wednesday may look differently. But don't forget that Duke University
11:19
study about how many things we do that are habitual. I'm willing to bet that what you do
11:24
most Sunday mornings and what you do most Wednesday evenings, you started to create a pattern. And I
11:30
just want you to be honest with yourself and write down how you've been spending the bookends of your
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day. And then I want you to compare the two sets of notes, compare the two sides of the paper
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And I want you to ask yourself, and again, this takes some honesty and some humility and some
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vulnerability, I want you to ask yourself, are you doing the things that you know you need to do
11:52
in order to become your best self? See, as a leader, you have to make an effort to show up
11:59
as your best self in every single thing that you do, whether that's in person or that's remotely
12:05
You owe that to your team and you owe that to those that you serve to show up as your best self
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And I want you to ask yourself, are you doing what you need to do in order to make that happen
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Now, if you do this self-audit, again, with some honesty, you will most likely start to uncover what's called a performance gap
12:21
And a performance gap is the gap between what we know we should be doing to be our best selves and what we're actually doing
12:29
and a good portion of my work that I do with both individuals and organizations is to help people
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start to close those performance gaps, to help you start to take the things from the left side
12:41
of the paper and make sure that you are making the time and emphasizing and prioritizing the
12:46
importance of the things on the left side of the paper and putting them into your morning and
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evening routine. See, this way you can show up for everyone, your family, your team, and those that
12:56
you serve as the best version of yourself, which is Leadership 101. So those are our habits
13:03
The second pillar that I want you all to heighten your awareness in is your mindset
13:08
kind of your view and your perspective on the world around you. I believe mindset is the biggest
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separator, not only in business, but in life in general. And I want you to work to develop what I
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call is a champion's mindset or a winner's mindset. And a champion's mindset is gaining
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confidence through knowing you're going to do the best you can with what you have where you are
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That's it. Just strive to always do the best you can with what you have wherever you are
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Now, the reason I love that framework is it inherently reduces or eliminates a trilogy of
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behaviors that will not only undermine your influence and impact, it will undermine your
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performance and will undermine your fulfillment as well. And that is blaming, complaining
13:58
and making excuses. I use absolutes very sparingly, but you will never, ever improve your situation or
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make things better for yourself or for those that you lead when you blame, complain, or make excuses
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So the sooner you can eliminate that trilogy of behaviors, the better off you'll be
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And don't ever forget as a leader, if you are going to expect it of others, you have to expect it of yourself
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So assuming you do not want a team that blames, complains, and makes excuses, then the very first step is making sure that you eradicate that from your behavior
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Don't ever forget that the very first step to improving the team is improving yourself
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So from a mindset standpoint, ultimately, what we're all trying to work towards is getting to the point that the outer world doesn't dictate our inner world
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That the outer world, circumstances, events, what people say, what people do, does not affect our inner world, our mindset, our attitude, our perspective, and how we show up
15:04
We want to insulate ourselves from that so that we're not at the mercy of circumstance
15:09
We're not at the mercy of what is going on around us. See, when this comes from within and we generate a winner's mindset from within, then we have
15:17
the keys to the car. Then we and we alone decide how we are going to show up, how we're going to lead, and how
15:24
we're going to influence and impact. So when you're able to do that, then you become emotionally agile, which should be the goal
15:32
of every leader. Because don't forget, if you're not emotionally agile, then you're emotionally fragile
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And as we've all been tested significantly over the past two years during this global pandemic, the most effective leaders simply cannot be emotionally fragile
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Now, the third pillar that I want you to heighten your awareness of is your focus, or what I'll actually call refocus
15:58
In today's day and age, I don't know that it's realistic to expect ourselves to sustain long periods of uninterrupted focus
16:08
I just don't know that that's realistic. But what we can do is learn to develop an awareness of when we not focused of when our mind wanders of when we distracted and then quickly refocus the lens And that ability to refocus is what will allow us to stay in the present moment So what is it that you need to
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refocus the lens on? I want you to think of the acronym WIN. I first heard this from Lou Holtz
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the Hall of Fame coach, football coach from Notre Dame football. And he came up with the acronym WIN
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W-I-N. And it stands for what's important now. At any given moment of any given day
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you should be able to take a deep breath and ask yourself, am I choosing to place my attention
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in what I value most in this moment? See, we've all agreed unanimously that time is our most
17:00
precious resource, but then by default, that means our attention in the present moment is
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the number one currency we have to offer. And we want to make sure we are investing that
17:08
as wisely as possible and as consistently as possible. So any given moment throughout the day
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you need to ask yourself, am I focused on what I believe is most deserving of my attention
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in this moment? So it's a constant recalibration process. You should be able to do this dozens and
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dozens of times over the course of the day until it just becomes habit and automatic so that you
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are locked in and you are refocused on what you consider most important. And another way of saying
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that, and I've heard this from both Nick Saban, the illustrious coach of Alabama football, and I've
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heard this from Oprah Winfrey. So it has to be true if those two are saying it, that is to learn
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how to be where your feet are. That's the actual, you know, silent triggering system that I have with
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myself. I'm just constantly asking myself throughout the day, am I being where my feet are
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Am I fully present? See, wherever my feet are, that's where my head and my heart need to be as
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well. Now to slightly expand on this concept of living in the present moment and being able to
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refocus the lens, I want to share the three pillars of living in the present moment. The first
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is the ability to refocus the lens on the next play. The second is to refocus the lens on what
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you have control over. And the third is to refocus the lens on the process. So let's unpack each of
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those. I've had a chance over my career to work with many of basketball's best players. I had an
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opportunity to work with Kevin Durant and Victor Oladipo when they were in high school, which then
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led to work with Nike basketball and Jordan Brand and USA basketball. And I got to work events for
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Kobe Bryant and LeBron James and Steph Curry. And one thing I noticed about those guys was their
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ability to be locked in and present and how quickly they could move to the next play
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See, a good portion of my work when I was in the direct basketball training space was to get
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players focused on the next play. You just missed a layup. It's okay. Next play. You just turned the
19:10
ball over. It's okay. Next play. I know the referee didn't blow their whistle. Next play
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Well, as a performance coach, why would I want my players focused on the next play
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It's the only one they can do anything about. They can't do anything about that mislayup, that turnover, or the referee's missed call
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That is now in the rearview mirror. It's in the past. There's nothing they can do to change that
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So any emotional currency or energy that they put into something in the past that can't be changed
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means they're not investing that emotional currency and energy into the present moment
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which they can still have an effect on. So the sooner you can move to the next play
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no matter what just happened, then the more you'll be able to be locked in
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and dialed into the present moment. The second pillar of being present
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is learning how to focus on the only two things in this world you have 100% control over 100% of the time
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That is your own effort and your own attitude. We call this control the controllables
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Focus on your own effort and your own attitude and let every single thing else go
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Now, I don't want this to be a game of verbal semantics. I know that you can take some effort and some attitude
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and mix them together and you have preparation. Certainly you are in control of your preparation
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You can take effort and attitude and mix them together and you get enthusiasm
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Certainly you are in control of your enthusiasm, but those are really spokes off of the same wheel
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Ultimately, you control your effort and you control your attitude. And I'm willing to bet if I was sitting down
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with any one of you individually over a cup of coffee, and I asked you if giving your best effort
20:46
was a choice, you would say yes. And I agree completely. I do believe that working hard is a
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choice. But what most people fail to recognize or acknowledge is that if working hard is a choice
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then not working hard is also a choice. It has to have another side to that coin
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And it simply can't be a choice that you make very consistently if you want to be the high
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performing leaders that you're capable of. Same thing when it comes to attitude. I kind of covered
21:13
this already when I was talking about mindset, but as far as attitude is concerned, it's accepting
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the fact that you do not control the world around you and you're at peace with that, but that you do
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control your responses to what happens around you. Don't ever give that power away. And high
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performing leaders consistently choose responses that are favorable, that move them forward
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that improve their situation. Now, just to be clear, when it comes to both mindset and attitude
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I'm not saying this means you like everything that goes on around you. I'm not saying these
21:46
things are your preferences. I'm saying you don't have any control over them. So the sooner you can
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come to a place of acceptance, then the sooner you can consciously choose a response that will
21:56
move you forward. And the third pillar of being in the present moment is learning how to focus on
22:02
the process. This is one of the hardest things for leaders to accept because most leaders are
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incredibly ambitious and very goal-driven. But I want you to learn how to detach from outcomes
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and focus more on the process. Now, having a North Star and having a goal or having a quota
22:19
for sales professionals is important. There's nothing wrong with that. But once you've established
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what your goal is or your North Star, I want you to take your eyes off of it and put it on the
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process, on the daily behaviors and habits that you need to execute consistently to increase the
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chance that you'll reach that goal. The best ogy I can think of is if you're tasked with
22:43
building a brick wall, don't worry about the wall. Focus on laying each and every brick with as much
22:51
care and precision as you can. See, if you lay each and every brick as perfectly as you can
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the wall will take care of itself. You don't need to focus on it. And I feel the exact same way with
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every single goal you have in your life or every single goal you have in your business. We've got
23:08
to focus on the process. The best that I've ever seen execute this is Bart Lundy and his staff
23:15
of the men's basketball program at Queens University, one of the top division two programs
23:20
in the United States. And Coach Lundy and his staff have figured out that there are four key
23:27
stats, four key ytics that heavily influence whether or not they win a basketball game. And
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you know, keep in mind that the game of basketball, as Simon Sinek would say, is a finite game
23:38
We've all universally agreed that the team that has the most points on the scoreboard at the end
23:43
of the game is declared the winner. And I'm very well aware that, as Simon says, business and life
23:50
is much more infinite. It isn't an infinite game. It's evergreen. There's not necessarily a
23:54
definitive start and stop. And if I were to interview every single one of you individually
23:59
and ask you what winning looks like in business or in life, I'll most likely get some variance
24:04
in your answers. So I'm well aware of the differences. However, you can absolutely
24:08
still apply this lesson. And I want you to hear what I'm saying when I'm sharing about Coach
24:13
Lundy's approach and figure out how you can apply that directly to your business and to your team
24:18
So as I said, Coach Lundy has figured out that there are four key statistics that heavily
24:23
influence whether or not Queen University men basketball team wins a game The first is turnover differential If we can have more possessions than our opponent it gives us a better chance to win The second is offensive rebound differential If we can rebound
24:40
our own missed shot and take more shots than our opponent, it gives us a better chance to win
24:46
Number three, are free throws attempted? In the game of basketball, the free throw is the highest
24:51
percentage shot per possession. And if we can take more of those than our opponent, it gives us a
24:56
better chance to win. And four are three-pointers attempted. The three-pointer is a massive weapon
25:02
in college basketball. And if we can take more clean looks from three than our opponent
25:06
it gives us a better chance to win. When Queens University comes out on top in those four
25:14
statistical categories, they win 97% of their games. I'm going to say that again because it's
25:24
so important. When Queen's University comes out on top in those four statistical categories
25:29
they win 97% of their games, which means mathematically they are almost
25:35
unbeatable when they simply do those four things. So now I'm going to ask you lovely folks another
25:42
set of rhetorical questions. What do you think Coach Lundy and his staff talk about, remind
25:49
and emphasize before every workout, every practice, every film session, and before every game
25:59
Those four things. What do you think Coach Lundy and his staff talk about, remind, and emphasize
26:04
every time they are building a practice plan or dissecting film? Yeah, it's those four things
26:12
See, Coach Lundy and his staff never talk about winning. They don't talk about trophies
26:16
They don't talk about banners and they don't talk about championships. They only talk about those four things
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because they know if they can get their team to execute those four things at a high level
26:26
the winning, the trophies, the banners and the championships will just take care of themselves
26:31
So the reason I share that with you all is I want you to get crystal clear
26:35
in your own respective organizations and businesses, what are the measurable ytics
26:40
that will dictate or heavily influence whether or not you reach your North Star
26:45
What are the micro skills and the daily habits and behaviors that you need to do every single day
26:50
and your team needs to do every single day to greatly increase the chance
26:55
that you reach that North Star? And once you've defined those things
26:59
then you need to make sure you talk about them, you remind your team of them, and you emphasize them every single day
27:04
Because if they can focus on whatever those things are that you determine, then the scoreboard will simply take care of itself. When it comes to transformational
27:16
leadership and core values, when it comes to your habits and your mindset and your ability to
27:22
refocus, don't ever forget that the little things make a huge difference, especially when done
27:29
consistently. Back in 2008, I was working as the performance coach at Montrose Christian
27:34
a very small private school just north of Washington, D.C. It's where Kevin Durant graduated from
27:40
And I was getting ready for practice and for what I thought was just going to be a normal day of practice
27:45
And I walked through the gym doors. And to my surprise, I'm standing 10 feet away from my idol
27:52
I thought this was just gonna be a normal day of practice. I walk in through the gym doors
27:57
and I'm standing two arms lengths away from my hero. I mentioned him earlier, Coach K
28:03
the head men's basketball coach at Duke University. I had admired Coach K for my entire career
28:09
and he was the one person in the world I wanted to meet more than anyone. And I had a chance to chat with him before practice
28:14
Now it's kind of comical looking back on it as I didn't quite have the awareness or presence back then
28:20
that I'd like to believe I have now because I don't remember a single word
28:24
that either one of us said. As pivotal and as influential as this conversation was
28:28
and as impactful it was on my life, I don't remember anything that either one of us said
28:33
But I'll never forget how Coach K made me feel. He made me feel like I was the most important person in the gym
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I wasn't. The kid he was recruiting was the most important, but he made me feel like I was
28:47
He maintained great eye contact and had a warm smile. He had very positive and open posture and body language
28:53
And he showed an authentic and genuine curiosity and kept asking me question after question
28:58
about my work with the team. Well, I was raised very old school
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I was raised that when someone goes out of their way to do something nice for you, you handwrite them a thank you note
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So I went home that night and I hand wrote him a thank you note. Said something to the effect of, Coach K, you have no idea how amazing it was to finally meet you
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Thank you so much for your time. I'll always be rooting for you and Duke. And I put a stamp on it and I sent it off to Durham, North Carolina
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And I figured that would be that. Well, three weeks later, I go to my mailbox and I get a note back from Coach K
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I know that may be tough for you all to read, but you can see just in just a few sentences on the front of his iconic stationery, he basically said, no, Alan, it was so nice to talk to you
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You're doing a terrific job. Always rooting for you. Keep up the great work. How long do you think it took him to write this
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Even if he's a little bit slow? I don't know, maybe 60 seconds
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Can we agree that over the course of our entire life, 60 seconds is a little thing
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Well, this little thing had a profound impact on my life. This little thing is the reason I wake up every single day with an attitude of gratitude
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to tell as many people as I possibly can, thank you. great job. I appreciate you. This little thing is the reason why I am personally relentless
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when it comes to returning voicemails, emails, and text messages. Now, I realize I'm heavily
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biased and some of you may disagree with my assertion, but I believe if the greatest coach
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in the history of all of team sports can make the time to return my handwritten note
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you better believe I can reply to your email. You better believe I can call you back or return
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your text. This little thing made a huge difference. And that's the thought that I
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want to leave you all with, that the little things you do as leaders, especially when it comes to your
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habits and your mindset and your focus will make a huge difference. Now, before I take my virtual
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bow. It's certainly been my honor to serve you. I hope that you found this helpful and beneficial
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and got some ideas. If there's ever anything else I can do to serve you or your organizations
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please don't hesitate to reach out. You can easily find me at alansteinjr.com
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I also have a supplemental website, strongerteam.com. As Colin mentioned, I'm the author of two books
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the author of Raise Your Game, High Performance Secrets from the Best of the Best, which came out
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a couple of years ago. And right now I am about to launch my second book, the follow-up
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Sustain Your Game, High Performance Keys to Manage Stress, Avoid Stagnation, and Beat Burnout
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That book is available for pre-order right now and will officially launch on April 12th
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If you're interested in ordering my book for your organization, either book, and you send me an
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email, alan at alansteinjr.com, I can offer you a 42% discount and I can even sign each copy in
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advance. And lastly, I'm very easily found on social media at Alan Stein Jr. on LinkedIn
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on Twitter, on Instagram, on Facebook. So if there's anything I shared today that you have
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a question about or something you'd love to discuss further and add to the conversation
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please don't hesitate to reach me out. It would be my honor to serve. And with that
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I'll take a bow and I wish you all a wonderful rest of your day. Thank you, Colin, and to your team for putting on such an awesome event
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